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Answer me, O LORD my God; light up my eyes… Psalm 13:3

Suppose another Christian said, “I’ve been a believer for years, but it feels like God has left me. He doesn’t answer my prayers. Does God really care?” How would you try to help him or her?

First, recognize the experience. If a mature believer like David (a man after God’s own heart) can feel abandoned by God, no one should be surprised when a brother or sister experiences this. Don’t assume the worst about a believer who feels that God has abandoned him or her. Remember, the dark valley is a part of the walk of the Christian faith.

Second, discern the question. Not every sufferer is asking: Why? Some are asking: How long? Why? is about meaning; How long? is about endurance. Many psalms ask the question, Why? For example, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Psa. 22:1). But David is not asking, “How do I make sense of my suffering?” He is asking: “How much longer can I endure it?” It’s not a cry for wisdom; it’s a cry for strength. How do I get through the week?

Third, ask for help. Notice what David prays here: “O LORD my God; light up my eyes” (Psa. 13:3). That’s a prayer for strength. When a person is in an agony of soul, as David was, he is not looking for an answer, and it won’t help much if you try to give one. What she is looking for is strength—a sense of the help and presence of God. That’s why the best way you can help is to come alongside in genuine sympathy and help her draw near to God in prayer.

Has anyone ever said this to you? What happened?